Evanescent
by WildCherry45
Summary: Post TTITG, Pre DTMFG. How I thought the Chris & Haley scene would play out. NH. CH. Haley POV. COMPLETE!


Title: Evanescent

Author: WildCherry45

Notes: Set in Season 2. Post TTITKB, Pre DTMFG

Disclaimer: As usual, I own nothing. Sad, isn't it?

"I must admit I was charmed by your advances. Your advantage left me helplessly into you. I rushed this. We moved too fast, and tripped into the guestroom." – Death Cab For Cutie

--

"You know you're beautiful when you sing."

She didn't look up. Instead, her fingers ran over the notes on the music, her eyes firmly affixed on the sharps, flats and naturals painted onto the paper, seeming to flow seamlessly into one another. It's just music, she told herself. It wasn't anything else. Nathan was fooling himself and being overprotective. This was just music.

Whatever it was between her and Chris was just music. There was no other connection or needed explanation. The only reason why he was helping her was because he wanted to benefit himself in the process. There was no other reason why he would even bother wasting his time or money on her. She was just a naïve high school girl to him. That's it.

Haley bit her lower lip hard, knowing that there was no point in lying to herself any further. The damage was done. There was no taking anything back now. No taking back the hours that she spent in the studio recording with Chris. No taking back the lies that she told Nathan. No taking back the fight that had happened only a few nights ago. No taking back the words she said over the phone the next day when Chris asked her to come back. No taking back the drive to the studio. No taking back the stab she had just implemented upon Nathan… yet again.

No taking back anything. What's done was done. She was here now, still in Chris's studio… and still crying. She wiped her face, stained with tears, with the back of her hand, refusing to let her emotions get the best her. "Is that supposed to be charming?"

Ignoring her question, he pulled up a stool and sat down next to her, his voice scratchy, "Do you want to hear the recording?"

"Are you going to tear it apart?"

He raised an eyebrow and smirked, "Honesty is key."

"Right," Haley scoffed before she pushed the hair out of her face, taking in a deep breath, "Yeah, play it for me."

He disappeared into the sound room and a few seconds later, the recording of Haley's voice was ringing throughout the studio. She could hear the pain in her voice. She could hear the emotion in the words. She could hear the desperate need in her tone. It was like a recording of the torment she was experiencing for the past 48 hours. It was emotional. It was real. It was a little piece of her.

A little piece of her that Nathan didn't have.

She had been so caught up in her music for the past few weeks. It had brought back a feeling that she thought she had lost ever since her marriage to Nathan. She had started to feel a little more like Haley James again.. not Haley Scott, not the person she had vowed to become when she signed the marriage papers. She had officially become a wife that day.

She knew she would have to sacrifice some things.

She just didn't realize music was going to be one of them. There wasn't any time in the beginning of the marriage to worry about miniscule things such as her recordings and her hobbies or even the possibility of a future career in music. She didn't realize that she would miss it so much. But, every one of those long and dragging days, all she wanted to do was go back to her home where her grandmother's piano sat, alone and fading in the basement. She just wanted to go back, brush her fingers against the keys, hear the music pour out of the instrument and sing along with its beautiful melodies.

She just wanted to grasp that part of her once again.

Nathan had bought her a keyboard. She thought that would satisfy her. It didn't. It wasn't the same. It was too perfect, too concrete.. the keyboard was never out of tune. The piano had become a staple in her life. She loved every part of it, its dents, stuck keys and even its tendency to become out of tune. The keyboard was clean. It was a blank slate. It had no past. Singing and her music had become an altogether different experience. It became the Nathan version of her music and of that part of her past.

And, that killed her.

She didn't want what she had to change. She didn't want her music to change.

Music became the little part of her where she wouldn't let Nathan in. It was the only part of herself that she closed off. It was the only part of her that was just hers… and nobody else's. She intended to keep it that way.

Then Chris came into the picture.

And, it all fell down from there. It felt different with him for some reason. He may have been an all around jerk on the outside but when he was in a studio, he was open and he was passionate about music. It was something that came naturally to him and he had an aura about him, a sort of charisma that just made her want to be with him, sing with him and make music with him.

Nothing more, she said to herself at first. The thought had never even crossed her mind.

That changed the first time she sang with him, the first time that their voices blended together and created a sort of harmony that just couldn't be replicated. It changed the first time she looked into his eyes and saw the fire that was ignited in the depths of his orbs. She knew what he was thinking. She knew what he wanted. And, she knew his intentions.

It was a tricky scenario from there but she kept playing when she knew she shouldn't have. She knew it was beyond "just music" now. It was beyond a song. And, she kept coming back.

Music was her weakness. Chris somehow managed to play into that and use it to his advantage.

Haley swallowed hard as the song ended. She knew that he wanted her opinion of it. But, she couldn't tell him. This had to end and it had to end now. She refused to jeopardize her marriage even further. She loved Nathan too much for that to happen. Clearing her throat, she kept her eyes firmly affixed to the ground, "It's terrible. This is useless."

Chris furrowed his brow before he shook his head furiously, "No, it wasn't terrible. It needs work but there's a definite base there. If you want to get somewhere in this business, you can't just give up. I don't want to work with a quitter."

Yet another threat. This time she was biting back. "You know what's worse then a quitter, Chris? Somebody who can't feel and understand the music. I don't feel this," she gestured at the studio around her, "It doesn't work. It doesn't connect." Haley finally mustered the courage to look up, "Our voices don't connect."

He scoffed at her comment, looking to retaliate.

She stood before he could refute. Grabbing her purse and her jacket, she made her way to the door.

"Haley, wait," Chris grabbed her arm and pulled her back. She fell against him and regained her balance by holding onto the wall beside her.

Haley leaned back against the wall, her vulnerable position now becoming all too clear as he towered over her. Brushing the hair out of her face, he said softly, "Don't lie about this."

"Chris, I can't do this." She said firmly, "I won't-"

His lips brushed softly against hers.

For a moment, she paused and gave into the kiss. For a moment, she felt another man's touch other than her husband. For a moment, she relished the close proximity of someone whom she felt a strong and intense connection with. Somehow who had similar tastes and someone who blended so well with her musically. Someone that if she met before Nathan, she might have considered to be a worthy catch.

Haley pushed him away hard, shaking her head sharply, "No."

"Haley," he tried again, reaching for her.

She snatched her arm away, "The recording is over, Chris."

As she walked away, the cold feeling of resolution settled over her and she realized that the music of her past was gone as well, faded with the end of the recording and with the dormant state of her grandmother's piano. There was nothing she could do to bring it back. She had to accept that.

The moment was over.

--


End file.
